My
Beloved Diary,
I saw what Onam was for the first time;
it was amazing. Half the boys were looking like south-Indian dons and the other
half was fidgeting with their mundus. Some were busy pulling a Ranbir Kapoor from
the movie Sawariya. How can they not care about the innocence of our eyes? I
mean, our minds might be corrupt but our eyes? Such inconsiderate people.
The girls looked stunning - all wore
the same thing yet they all looked different and simply amazing. If it weren’t for the girls the event would have been
boring and uninteresting. But I want a mundu too. It’s a much easier for
people; subject to constraint that you can tie it. Just think about it. You
don’t have to starve for a week to look good in a mundu, you don’t have to
color coordinate, you don’t have to wax/tweeze your legs, your capris are
always there to protect you, you can always fold it in half, there is no
competition, and you can always adjust your mundu in public in Ranbir-Kapoor-Sawariya
style without giving a flying fish about other people getting really really uncomfortable.
Girls should be given mundus too.
Fish! There go my dreams of wearing
mundu. I triple folded my roomie’s Onam sari and tried to tie it like a mundu.
I can’t decide whether I look like an oversized marshmallow, a floating white cloud,
or, Olaf from frozen. Seems like it’s going to be saris for me. For life. But I
ain’t complaining.
And what’s with these insects. I don’t
know how, I don’t know why and I have no idea where bugs sneak into my room
from. People who say the bigger the better clearly have never had a 4 inch long
insect in their room and stare at them dead in the eye. If it weren’t for the
cleaning staff, I would have set my room on fire and run away long ago. Why
don’t these bugs get it that they are not welcome in my room? But I have learnt
my lesson from all this - never bring green comforters here. That’s where the
horror stories start from.
They have started serving mystery food
in the mess. The mysterious item on today’s menu looked like marmalade and
leaked oil like halwa. Interesting marketing tactic, suspense filled food – the
only thing that was missing till now. Take what you eat; guess what you eat.
Awesome! And what’s with these power cuts. This guy just stood there
contemplating his next move in shower because the power went out when in the
middle of the night in the middle of his shower. Perfect time to remember god.
Did you know that operations is all
about ganging, flexible equipment,
grinding and drilling; and there’s more to come. No wonder boys have a
preference for this specialization.
Hey! Remember the ass assaulting girl I
told you about. So… she drummed somebody’s bum with dandiya sticks during the
dandiya night. Yeeaahhh… And people call me crazy. Have you ever noticed that
the higher the boots go up your leg, hem of dress and heel, and platform of
your pumps go the higher the prices go. What’s worse is that we have come to
age where the saris are cheaper than bikinis. Über face palm. Kalyug I tell you. Ghor Kalyug.
And I
found an onion in the ocean! Why? Because lemons are too main stream.
Dying
to Write More
The Girl Hiding
Behind Glasses
